Confident people weren’t born that way.
They don’t have some super secret genetic advantage that makes them a confident person.
In fact…
Most confident people that I know today were shy, socially anxious, and confused in their teens and early 20’s.
But they decided to make a change and build the habits and behaviors of confident individuals.
If you aren’t feeling confident right now, these 7 tips can help you “Fake” your way into a state of confidence and feel more relaxed and present in every moment.
Enjoy…
1. They Have Strong Body Language and Are Relaxed in their Environment
Confidence is first and foremost, a state of acting.
You don’t have to feel confident to appear confident.
And appearing confident starts with your body language.
In order to display confident body language you need to focus on only three things.
- Open Posture: Take up more space, hold your shoulder’s back, keep your head up high, throw your arm over the couch. Open up and you will instantly appear more confident
- Stillness: Confident people don’t fidget. They don’t wring their hands or pace nervously. They stand with purpose and control their movements
- Slowness: Confident people don’t rush around anxiously. They move with ease and intention to their destination. Slow down and take a deep breath. You will instantly look more confident.
Entire books have been written on confident body language, but these three simple tactics are all that you need in order to instantly increase your perceived confidence levels and feel better about how you are interacting with your environment.
2. They Speak Less than They Listen and Only Open their Mouths When They Have Something Important to Say
Show me a confident person and I will show you someone who speaks with intention.
Do you ever see James Bond rambling on about pointless chatter?
Did Don Draper ever engage in idle chit chat?
Do you ever see the confident people that you know jumping into conversations and getting off to the sound of their voice?
Of course not!
Confident people listen to others and then speak.
When they speak, they do so slowly, clearly, and with purpose.
When they open their mouths other people listen.
Why?
Because confident people don’t waste words on unimportant matters.
If they are saying something, you can be darn sure it’s important.
So slow down, shut up, listen to others, and speak only when you have something of value to add.
This will provide you with an instant confidence boost and an increase in perceived status.
3. They Speak their Truth
Confident people don’t lie.
They don’t hold back their opinions.
And they don’t mince words.
If you want to start acting more confident, then start by speaking your truth.
If you want to do something, say it. If someone is pissing you off, call them out on it. If there’s something bothering you, don’t keep it to yourself.
Yes, you need to have tact and approach sensitive issues with caution.
But confident people don’t care about the opinions of others and this is reflected by the fact that they speak their truths whenever and wherever possible.
4. They Act without Permission or Validation
Sheep need to be led.
Confident people don’t.
If you want to do something, then do it.
If you want to go somewhere, then go.
Don’t ask for permission.
And don’t wait for other people to jump on board.
Live your life and chart your own path without asking anyone whether or not you can.
You are your own person.
So act like it.
Make your own decisions and own them. Beg forgiveness if you must. But never ask for permission to do the things you want.
5. They Laugh at Their Mistakes and Shortcomings
Confident people are, ironically, the people who are the most comfortable with their flaws and shortcomings.
They are the men and women who can laugh at the parts of themselves that they don’t like.
If someone makes fun of them, they blow it off and turn it into a joke.
They are masters of appropriate self deprecation (meaning that they will never beat themselves up, but if someone else is making fun of them, they know how to roll with the punches).
6. They Make No Apologies for Who They Are or What They Want
Confident people don’t apologize for who they are.
If someone else has a problem with their opinions, attitude, or words, they know that this is on the other person, not them.
If they are in conversation and someone gets offended by a political, religious, or otherwise divisive opinion that they hold, they DONT apologize.
It doesn’t matter if other people approve of or agree with you.
You are the only one who has to live with yourself and your decisions.
So make no apologies for who you are or what you believe.
7. They Treat Others with Respect
Above all, confident people treat others with respect.
Even though they refuse to accept crap from other people, they are kind to others and NEVER put other people down to make themselves look good.
They will lift others up, compliment their friends, and flatter new acquaintances.
They know that the only way to get ahead in life is to help other people and they are masters at shifting the spotlight from themselves to others.
Because, at the end of the day, this is the fastest way to achieve success.
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